When Leighton and her boyfriend, John, go to his favorite steakhouse for his birthday dinner, she imagines a calm night out celebrating John. But as their dinner comes to an end, feelings and emotions get out of hand when Leighton\u2019s moral obligations do not allow her to pay for John\u2019s part of the meal.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
I never imagined that his birthday would end with him screaming at me in a parking lot, accusing me of ruining his night. If I could rewind that dinner, maybe I\u2019d change a few things. But the truth is, I stuck to a boundary that I created way before John and I started dating.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
I didn\u2019t think that I was wrong. But now, I\u2019m not so sure.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Let me back up.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
John and I have been dating for almost a year now. And things were fine, mostly. He\u2019s 30 and I\u2019m 28, and we have our ups and downs like everyone else.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cWe\u2019re just figuring it out, Leighton,\u201d he would say to me after one of our fights. \u201cWe\u2019ll get past it all.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
I always agreed because there just seemed like something special was growing between us. And I liked the fact that John wanted to settle down.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
But one thing that has always been a point of tension between us is food. I\u2019ve been a vegetarian since I was eleven. I\u2019m not one of those people who push their beliefs on the next person, but for me, it was all about moral and personal reasons. It\u2019s a part of who I am, and that\u2019s just the way it\u2019s been for the longest time.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
And one more thing: I\u2019ve made it clear that I\u2019m not going to spend my money on meat. That\u2019s my bottom line.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
John knows this. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
In fact, he knew it from day one. When we first started dating, I told him straight up.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cI don\u2019t have any issues with you eating meat, but I won\u2019t pay for it. It\u2019s just a personal rule.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
He laughed at the time and said that it wasn\u2019t a big deal.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
But now, looking back, I realize how often it actually became an issue. At first, it was small stuff, like splitting the bill when we went out to eat. Sometimes he\u2019d order a vegetarian meal, and I\u2019d happily cover both of us.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Other times, he\u2019d get something meaty, and I\u2019d pay for my part, expecting him to cover his.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
It was fair, or so I thought.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
But John didn\u2019t seem to think so.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cIt\u2019s just food, Leighton. Jeez. You\u2019re fussing over this? You\u2019re not going to change the world by not buying a burger. Gosh.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
And that would be his line every single time I explained my point of view or stance to him.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
I\u2019d shrug it off, not wanting to argue over something I felt so strongly about. I\u2019ll admit, it did annoy me though. I mean, this man claimed to love me, but he didn\u2019t understand me. And that was frustrating.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Still, shouting my opinion wasn\u2019t how I did things. So I let it go.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
But then came his birthday. And that\u2019s when everything truly fell apart.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
We\u2019d been talking about John\u2019s birthday for weeks. I initially wanted to do a fancy dinner at home, mainly so that I could cater for myself. But the thought of cooking meat wasn\u2019t fun.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cI don\u2019t want to have something at home, Leigh,\u201d John said. \u201cThen we\u2019d have to entertain people. Let\u2019s just do dinner together. Just the two of us.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cFine,\u201d I agreed, thinking that it was the easier of the two options anyway.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
But when John mentioned where he wanted to go, I cringed completely.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
A steakhouse. He wanted to go to a steakhouse.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
I had only been there once before, and it was a nightmare for me. There was barely anything on the menu that didn\u2019t involve meat, except for maybe two salads and baked potatoes.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
But it was John\u2019s birthday, and I wanted to be supportive of him.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
The night started off just fine, better than I expected, actually.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
John picked me up and came inside for a quick glass of champagne before we left for the steakhouse.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cHappy birthday, darling,\u201d I said, giving him his present, which was a new pair of fancy sneakers that he had been eyeing for the longest time.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Honestly, it did put a dent in my monthly budget, and as a junior copywriter, I didn\u2019t get paid as much as I would have wanted. But it was John\u2019s birthday, and I figured he deserved some extra attention.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Which is why I got all dressed up and dabbed on my favorite perfume. I wanted everything to be perfect.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
When we got to the steakhouse, we sat at a little table in the corner, trying to make things as romantic as they could be in a steakhouse.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
John seemed happy. He smiled widely and kept reaching for my hand.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
I ordered a Greek salad and a baked potato, and he went all out. Again, it was his birthday, and he deserved this, right?<\/p>\n\n\n\n
He ordered the most expensive steak on the menu, a bottle of wine for us to share, and some sides. I didn\u2019t say anything when he ordered the steak, even though I knew what was coming.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
I didn\u2019t know why, but part of me hoped he\u2019d remember my rule. Maybe, just maybe, he\u2019d choose something else\u2026 or at least be prepared to pay for his own meal.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
After the food arrived, we ate in silence. John seemed to savor every bite of his steak, and at intervals, he would pick up his phone to reply to birthday messages.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Later, when the bill came, John didn\u2019t even hesitate. He slid it across the table with a grin.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cSo, you\u2019ve got this, right, Leigh?\u201d he said.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
I looked at him, a little taken aback.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cWait, what? You know how I feel about this\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cIt\u2019s my birthday, Leighton,\u201d he said with a flip of his hand, like that explained everything.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
I frowned, trying to remain calm.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cJohn, I told you before. I am not paying for meat. I\u2019ll cover the wine, the sides, and my portion of the meal. But the steak? That\u2019s on you.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
He blinked at me, the smile fading from his face.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cYou\u2019re kidding, right? For goodness\u2019 sake, it\u2019s my birthday, Leighton.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
I sighed. The tone in his voice told me that this wasn\u2019t going to go well.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cI know that it\u2019s your birthday. But that doesn\u2019t change my rule, John. I\u2019m not paying for the steak. And besides that, your birthday present has set me back with my budget.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
John\u2019s expression hardened in an instant, and he leaned back in his chair, crossing his arms.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cSo, you expect me to pay for my own birthday dinner? And you\u2019re trying to make me feel bad for getting me a birthday present?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cI didn\u2019t expect you to order the most expensive thing on the menu and assume that I\u2019d cover it,\u201d I shot back.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
John scoffed, shaking his head.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cI didn\u2019t budget for this. I thought you had it, Leighton. What a disappointment. Well, happy birthday to me, I guess.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
I leaned forward, trying to keep my voice down. The last thing I wanted was to cause a scene.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cJohn, I\u2019ve told you before. I don\u2019t spend money on meat. I\u2019ll do the rest, but you have to cover the steak.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
I spoke slowly as I repeated my words, trying to get it to sink in.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
But John just rolled his eyes and sat back, staring at me like I\u2019d just told him that the sky was green.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cIt\u2019s my birthday, Leighton,\u201d he repeated. \u201cMy girlfriend is supposed to treat me.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cI did treat you!\u201d I snapped. \u201cI got you a present, John! I\u2019m paying for most of this meal. Honestly, what more do you want?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
At this point, I could feel the other diners glancing over at us. I tried to lower my voice, but I was getting flustered.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cAnd you cannot possibly expect me to just throw my principles out the window because it\u2019s your birthday. What sort of woman would I be?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
He stood up suddenly, his chair scraping against the floor, and threw his napkin down on the table.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cAnd you cannot possibly expect me to just throw my principles out the window because it\u2019s your birthday. What sort of woman would I be?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
He stood up suddenly, his chair scraping against the floor, and threw his napkin down on the table.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cYou know what? I need a minute.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Before I could even respond, John stormed off toward the bathroom, leaving me sitting there like an idiot. My face burned with embarrassment. Everyone was watching now.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
I sat there for ten minutes, then twenty.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
The waiter came by and refilled my water glass, eyeing the empty seat across from me.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cWould you like another glass of wine?\u201d he asked me politely.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
I shook my head.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cNo, thank you\u2026 But could you get a card machine?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
He smiled and nodded.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
When he brought it over, I paid for my meal, the wine, and the sides. But not the steak.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cMy boyfriend will pay for that,\u201d I said. \u201cWe have a thing where he pays for his meat.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
The waiter gave me a puzzled look and nodded again.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cThat\u2019s not a problem,\u201d he said.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
After twenty minutes of waiting for John, I decided to leave. I figured he\u2019d cool off eventually and come find me.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Sure enough, as I walked out of the restaurant, I saw him sitting on a bench near the parking lot, sulking.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cWhat the hell, John?\u201d I asked. \u201cYou just left me in there!\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
He looked up, not even apologetic.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cDid you pay?\u201d he demanded.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cI paid for what I owed,\u201d I said. \u201cYou need to go back for yours.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cI\u2019m not going back in there, Leighton,\u201d he said.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cWhat? Why not?\u201d I asked.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cBecause they\u2019ll recognize me. Don\u2019t you see? It\u2019s like a dine-and-dash situation. I walked out. They saw me. I\u2019ll be banned from this place if I go back in.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
I couldn\u2019t believe what I was hearing. I couldn\u2019t believe this man\u2019s logic.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u2018\u201dYou\u2019re the one who walked out without paying, John. That\u2019s on you.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
He glared at me, anger flashing in his eyes.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cYou\u2019re so damn selfish, Leighton. You couldn\u2019t just pay for one meal? On my birthday?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
I stared at him, stunned. \u201cI\u2019ve done nothing but pay for you tonight. But I told you from the beginning, I\u2019m not paying for meat.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cIt\u2019s not about the money, Leighton! It\u2019s about you being so damn stubborn. Grow up!\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
I could feel my hands shaking. I took a deep breath, forcing myself to stay calm. \u2018I\u2019m not doing this. I\u2019m leaving.\u2019<\/p>\n\n\n\n
I turned on my heel and started walking toward the car, expecting him to follow. It was his car, but I had the keys. When I turned around to see where he was, he was just sitting there, sulking like a kid who didn\u2019t get his way.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
I got in the car, slammed the door, and drove home alone. The entire drive, I couldn\u2019t stop replaying the night in my head. How had it all gone so wrong? Was I really the bad guy here?<\/p>\n\n\n\n
When I got home, I texted him.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Just suck up your feelings and attitude and go settle the bill. It\u2019s your favorite steakhouse. Are you really not going to go back there?<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n He didn\u2019t respond for hours. And when he did, it was just more accusations at me.<\/p>\n\n\n\n I didn\u2019t bother to reply. I knew that he would come over and get his car soon. We could talk then.<\/p>\n\n\n\n What would you have done?<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" When Leighton and her boyfriend, John, go to his favorite steakhouse for his birthday dinner, she imagines a calm night out celebrating John. But as their dinner… <\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0,"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"aioseo_notices":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/pulsperry.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/56117"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/pulsperry.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/pulsperry.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/pulsperry.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/pulsperry.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=56117"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/pulsperry.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/56117\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":56118,"href":"https:\/\/pulsperry.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/56117\/revisions\/56118"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/pulsperry.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=56117"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/pulsperry.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=56117"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/pulsperry.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=56117"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}